Cole's Surgery!

Cole’s surgery on his lip was scheduled for August 27 at 7am.  We had to be at the hospital at 5:30am which I am not sure why because the nurses did not even get to the hospital until 6am.  I had a hard time sleeping the night before not knowing how the next day was going to go.  But he seemed happy to be just going anywhere with us not caring about the time. 

 

This is in the lobby before surgery waiting for them to come and get us.  He loved playing with Nonnie's glasses while he waited. 

 

 

Here is Daddy helping him get dressed for his surgery.  We were all a mess inside but did a good job acting like everything was ok.

 

Because Cole is adopted and we had only been home for 3 1/2 months, it was advised by other people who have adopted and gone through surgeries, to go into the OR with him until they put him under. And to also be the first one he sees when he wakes up.  I asked one of the nurses about this and she seemed very put off by my request.  I was a little upset because of the comment she made.  “We do this all the time with adopted kids and we know what we are doing”.  She did not want me to go back there at all.  I bit my tongue, which was hard for me, but I wanted to snap back...  Are you there when they go home and have attachment issues?  Are you there when the child is struggling because abandonment is a normal for them and they have never had a constant caregiver who was always there to comfort?  But instead I talked to the anesthesiologist.  She was very apprehensive at first and I could tell that she did not like the idea either.  But eventually she agreed to it, if I would follow two rules.  1) Do whatever she tells me to do and don’t get in the way  2) Leave when I am told to leave.  Also, I had to wear what is called a bunny suitJ

Cole did not like how I was dressed and kept trying to take the stuff off.

That is my Mom in the background.  I thank God she was there because Dan had to go into work that day to finish something on a project.  Also, she is a wealth of information because she had to go through these exact same surgeries. 

So I was able to walk with him to the OR.  I felt so horrible because he was so trusting in me.  He held my hand the whole way down never not trusting me.  I felt like I was leading my little lamb to slaughter.  I know that is a bit dramatic but that is how it felt.  Also, I know he needs these surgeries to better his life but I did not know how hard that was going to be.  It is one thing knowing a child you are adopting needs surgeries.  It is another to have your child you love need surgeries. 

Once we got to the OR, I laid him on the table and he just laid there and looked up at me.  I could tell he knew something was up but again he trusted me.  He started to get a little anxious so the anesthesiologist went ahead and put the mask on him.  He started screaming and I had to hold him down until it kicked in and he went into dreamland.  Oh yea I felt horrible for it but again knew it was best.  I then left the OR and went back to the room where we are supposed to wait.  The surgery took longer because they could not find an IV spot very easy and because they were putting in a spinal block for another part of the surgery I have not talked about much.  The spinal block failed because of a dimple on his back and this ended up causing him great pain.  Each of the surgeons came in and talked to us and gave us updates but I can hardly remember what they each said because my mind was numb. 

Finally, they came and got me.  I was so relieved because he had not woken up yet. 

I felt so bad for him because his face was all swollen.  When he started to wake up, he was crying and flailing about.  He ended up hitting his nose with the arm restraints.  The nurse had me climb into bed and hold him.  He immediately looked up at me and fell back to sleep.  I am so thankful they let me go in before he woke up because I was able to comfort him as his Mamma should.  It made me feel so special and loved that I meant that much to him.  We then had a hard time waking him up because he wanted to stay asleep.  When he did start to wake up it was because he was in so much pain.  We had to give him a narcotic to help ease the pain. 

They sent us home that same day.  He hated the arm restraints so much that it caused more of a problem than a help.  He would scream and flail because of them.  I was afraid he was going to hurt himself with them.  So I took them off and told him that if he touched his face I would have to put them back on.  He was so good.  Every once in a while he would start to reach for his face think twice and put his hand back down. 

Dan came back to the hospital after the surgery and decided to not go back in that day because we really needed his help.  He had to run to the store to pick up prescriptions, juice, Q-tips and much more.  He also picked us up some lunch.  The rest of Monday was very rough!  I cried, my Mom cried and Dan cried because Cole was in so much pain the whole day.  We just felt so bad for him.  I had to hold him the whole time and could not put him down.  The only way we could get him to eat the first three days was liquid through a syringe. 

Our girls stayed with a friend Sunday night, and was going to stay with them Monday night, but I needed their help and needed them home.  I am so thankful I did have them come home because as soon as they walked through that door, Cole’s demeanor changed.   I did not think of it at the time, but Cole was in an orphanage and foster care.  He had seen his “siblings” leave all the time.  When they came back home, he was so happy to see them and to see that they had not left.  I love how much he loves them and vice versa! 

The first three days were the hardest.  He did not want me to leave him ever and I could not sleep at night because I had to give him medicine every four hours, he cried constantly in his sleep, and I had to make sure he did not hit his face.  I was an emotional wreck by day three.  He was starting to be ornery again so I could tell he was better.  So when Dan came home that day at 6pm, I went straight to bed.  I sleep a peaceful two hours and woke up feeling better.  We had some awesome friends come over and make us a meal and help tidy up the kitchen and entertain Cole while I slept.  Thanks Delgados!  Also, I had a friend Michelle who came earlier that day to help us out!  And a friend bring us a meal Tuesday!  I really needed all their help and I am very appreciative of it. 

 

Something also very interesting was that he did not want to take his shoes off.  They were new ones that we had bought for him at REI, and he refused for them to come off. 

Here he is showing them off!

 

 

 

 

 

Cole and I had cabin fever by the end of the week so on Sunday we all went to the zoo.  It was rainy and we all got wet but had a lot of fun:)

 

I think Dr. Sadove did a great job!  Cole's next surgery is supposed to be December 10th to close the palate.  Then he will have a nose revision around 4 years old.